Thursday, November 27, 2008

It happened just like in a Donald Duck cartoon

Today, Thanksgiving, I thought I would be a good wife and daughter and make some mint chocolate cookies to take to dinner today.  I started first thing in the morning.  

Found the cookie book
Pre-Heat oven
Gathered the ingredients
Started combining.

So, I am measuring the flour to be sifted with the cocoa and, first of all, my baking powder is from like the turn of the century, so  I doubt it will work properly.  Next I take grab the cocoa powder that is brand new from the store just last week.  I remove the lid, carefully start peeling back the foil seal....and POOF! Face full of cocoa powder.  No kidding.  It was all in my hair, covering my glasses, my shirt, the counter, the floor, the cook book.  Everything!  And my reaction was just like the cartoon.  Stunned silence, followed by a small cough, and surveying the damage, then wiping one finger across my glasses and coughing again.  I moved to the sink and brushed off as much as I could, then took the book to the garbage and brushed off the book.  
I have made a bigger mess of my kitchen in the last 45 minutes, than I ever have in my entire life. I kept knocking things on the floor, and into the sink.  Not to mention the general mess I made while adding the dry to the wet.  Oh well.  

Anyone have a mop I can borrow?

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

And now, the moment you have been waiting for....

Nik's Birthday!!!

This picture is cool cause even though I missed the impact, you can stil see the broken tee spinning off to the right. Cool!!
This is the first time I have been golfing since my Dad took me and Mason when I was like 12. I am still at the same skill level. But I had a good time!

I just liked this picture of Nik's hand.

I am really not that bored. I was just taking a break. Plus, I have cut my hair, now, so you will all have a reference when I finally post a picture with the new cut.


A couple weeks ago Nik and I baby sat for the F* family and Sofia helped me practice my photography skills. It was a really short shoot, but here are a couple of my favorites.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Ok, so far I have survived. Please keep praying for me that I will not suddenly get sick over Thanksgiving.

Oh, and Nik is getting better too.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Nik is sick, and I am off today.  Pray for me.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Happy Birthday Lou!

Happy birthday to my favorite Laurie! I am a little late, her birthday was actually Friday! Oh well, I think I make up for it with this picture. This picture exemplifies every thing I feel about Lou. She is beautiful, kind, loving, an understanding mother, a fun friend, and a welcoming sister-in-law. I am so glad to be in her family now. I am sad I could not go the the movie she was so excited about, but it looks like they had fun without me! I hope you had a good day Lou, and that you know everyone was thinking about you on your day!
Oh, and Nik might be mad at me for doing Lou's birthday before his....

Midlife Crisis

Married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 25 years ago, We had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old blond.

Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 50 year old woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old blond, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car and sleeping on a sofa bed....

Friday, November 21, 2008

Some Mormon Jokes

Two Mormon missionaries in dark suits on bikes recently were left motionless and speechless when two scantily clad female joggers passed them at Sego Lilly Lane and 1300 East in Sandy. In fact, they didn't notice a Sandy City police car behind them, until the officer advised over his loudspeaker, "Think of a hymn, elders."


A young Mormon was on his mission, carrying the Book of Mormon in his coat pocket when he was shot by an armed robber. Fortunately, the bullet lodged in the book and saved him. "See," the missionary said to his companion, "that bullet couldn't get through Second Nephi either.


A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" Little Annie replied, "Because people are sleeping."


A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."


A man: God, how much is a million dollars to you?
God: It is but a penny.
A man: God, how long is a million years to you?
God: It is but a second.
A man: God, could you please give me a penny?
God: Sure, just a second.


One Sunday evening my four year old daughter, Ginger, was explaining the contents of each of a series of pictures she had received in her primary class that day. She came to a picture of Jesus surrounded by little children. One of the children sat on Jesus' knee. In a solemn and reverent tone, my daughter told us that this was a picture of Jesus asking the little children what they wanted for Christmas.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

For Sale

Mason is selling his car! If you want it, let me know.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008


Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE...... The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Do I have something in my teeth?

Would you want some one to tell you if you had something that didn't belong on your face? In your teeth? In your hair? I think I would. It might be a little embarrassing right at first, but then at least you know you aren't walking around all day looking stupid.

But what if you stink? Would you want someone to tell you that? And how do you tell someone that? Obviously it has to be something other than "Hey buddy, you smell." Especially if it is a friend or family member.

At my work I come across more smelly people in a day, than most people do in a month. Lucky me. Now, the problem I am having is, is it OK for me to tell them that their breath smells so bad it is making me gag? That their clothes smell so much like old cigarette smoke, the smell will linger long after they are gone? That showering once a week should be common practice for those over 10? Something tells me no. If I said, "excuse me, but can I have you not breathe in my face, your breath smells like something died last week has yet to be found." I would be reported to my manager for bad customer service. She would probably be on my side, but that would not matter in the long run.

Is there anything I can do to stop the stench?

Friday, November 14, 2008

Stupid English

Can you read these correctly ... the first time?

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The landfill was so full, they had to refuse more refuse.

4) Please polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could be in the lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier chose to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, it is time to present the present.

8) A bass was paint ed on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot , the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does strange antics when does are around.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong for us to wind the sail.

18) I shed a tear upon seeing the tear in the painting.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) I need to intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, no ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.English muffins were not invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies,while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet,are meat. We take English for granted.But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly,boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2indices? Is it not crazy that you can make amends, but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think the first teachers of the language' should have been committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. How is it that people recite a play and play at a recital;ship by truck and send cargo by ship; have noses that run and feet that smell??

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down; you fill in a form by filling it out and an alarm goes of f by going on.
English was invented by people, not computers, and reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all.This is why...when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Help a Baby Out!

Baby Mia has a heart condition and the blogging world is coming together to help. Annie posted about her too, and now it is my turn. Old Red Barn Co. is giving away three quilts in support of Baby Mia, and I am trying to win one. You can enter to win here! Good luck!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

You might be a Mormon if...

If all your dishes have your name written on them with masking tape...You might be a Mormon.

If you postdate your checks while shopping on Sunday...You might be a Mormon.

If you believe Heck is the place for people who do not believe in gosh...You might be a Mormon.

If your Mom was pregnant at your sister’s wedding reception...You might be a Mormon.

If you pray that your food might "nourish and strengthen your body" before eating doughnuts...You might be a Mormon

If you think Jell-O is one of the basic food groups...You might be a Mormon

If at least one of your salad bowls is at a neighbor's house...You might be a Mormon.

If you've ever written a "Dear-John" to more than two missionaries on the same day....You might be a Mormon.

If you were frustrated when your son "only" got accepted to Harvard...You might be a Mormon.

If you have one kid in diapers and one on a mission...You might be a Mormon.

If you have never arrived at a meeting on time...You might be a Mormon.

If you have more wheat stored in your basement than most third world countries...You might be a Mormon.

If you've already got your order in for volume 50 of "The Work and The Glory"...You might be a Mormon.

If you think it is all right to watch football on Sundays as long as a direct descendant of Brigham Young is playing...You might be a Mormon.

If you have to guess more than five times the name of the child you're disciplining...You might be Mormon.

If you automatically assume that BYOB means, Bring Your Own Burgers...You might be Mormon.

If you go to a party and someone spikes the punch with Pepsi...You might be a Mormon.

If you arrive to an activity an hour late and are the first person there...You might be a Mormon.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the
reception was excellent.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

I went to a seafood disco last week ... and pulled a mussel.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A "fsh."

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says,"Dam!"

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain;they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins, for goodness sake! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little,which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ......... (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good).....A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

And finally, there was the person who posted twenty different puns to her blog, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh.However: No pun in ten did.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Party Time!

A big thanks to Jenny and Tyson who had us all over for games and carmel apples last night! They are new in the ward and it was great to get to know them a little more. Even better, new couple Sara and Chad were there as well, so new friends all around! Fun night guys!

Friday, November 07, 2008

Help me decide

I am going to get my hair cut next week and I think I need some help deciding what to do. Please ignore what is actually going on in the pictures, and the color. I am sticking to my original for now. FOR NOW.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Warmth at the end of the tunnel

As we speak my furnace is being replaced. Or at least I hope so. That is what the letter on our door yesterday said. Nine A.M. Well its 9:18 and it had better be underway. Nik graciously volunteered to stay and over see the whole process (plus he wanted a hot shower, cause contrary to what they told us, we do not still have hot water.). I look forward to an update when they are finished.

Last night we were disappointed and frozen to find out that we did not have hot water. But because wifey here was so amazing freezing Nik boiled at least six pots of water so we could take a warm bath. And warm is was. I am usually not a fan of really hot baths, but I think that my body was trying to stock pile the warm for later when it would be gone. After the bath we blasted the heater in the bedroom and cuddled in to watch Chuck.

It was a good night.

Oh, and I never thought I would find myself grateful for the snow, but last night was about 10 degrees colder than the night before, and it is all due to the snow. That layer of clouds kept me from freezing two nights ago. Unlike the clear skys we had last night that resulted in a Popsicle Lena.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

March of the Penguins or, "Why the English's Don't Have Heat"

Last night I slept in my warmest pajama pants, one of my dad's old sweat shirts, Nik's socks, under a big quilt with the space heater going. Nik slept in his G's. I guess he is just warmer blooded than me. Lucky.

Turns out our furnace has cracks in it. Cracks that leak gas into our apartment. And probably have been for over a year. Yay. (and yes, we have a carbon monoxide detector, and no, it was not plugged in.) So it was a long cold night with our gas shut off. And who knows when it will be back on. That responsibility falls with the management of Spring Hollow Apartments. So we may have heat by April.

Any one have some hand warmers?

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Daniel Craig is Hot

As many of you know the new Bond movie, Quantum of Solace comes out on November 14th. As you may also know, my husband is obsessed with Bond. And I obviously think he is pretty good looking, so it works out well.

To the point. Nik and his work are going to see the movie Friday night (the 14th) and we had been planning on seeing it for Nik's birthday (the 17th, for those who want to get him presents) so this is perfect. We would also like to extend an open invitation to all who want to go with us to the movie. Please either comment on the post, call me, text me, or Nik to let us know and we will keep you informed. We do not know the theater or time yet, but it will be in the evening.

Thanks for playing!

Monday, November 03, 2008

Rosie the Riveter, or "My Life With Curly Hair"

I miss it. I really do.

For those of you who may be questioning this, I do NOT have curly hair. At all. And my hair does not normally hold curl well.

So, Thursday night Amy came over to put spongy rollers in my hair, it took about an hour and a half from start to finish. The result the next morning was something resembling Little Orphan Annie. Not bad, but not what I wanted. So I spent the morning finger combing my hair to see if it would loosen up a little. The result is the picture from the previous post. That lasted most of the day. I did have to do some touch ups before my party that night. Oh, and it turns out I DO own a curling iron, but it is a 1/4" one. So it makes very little curls. I was also reminded of why I do not curl my hair by myself. CURLING IRONS ARE USELESS!! They look good at the beginning, and then, nothing. Oh well. I kept the curl til Sunday after dinner. And I was sad to see it go.

When I woke up this morning and saw my flat, straight hair. It made me sad inside. And it made me want to cut and/or dye my hair soon. Maybe a perm. Maybe not.

My hair is boring.

Saturday, November 01, 2008


I'm sorry I didn't have a Halloween post, but I am posting about Halloween now, so that will have to do. Here are some pictures of the day.

Me at work. I was Rosie the Riveter (don't I look hard-core!). Thanks to Amy who made my hair uber-curly, something I am not used to and got lots of compliments on. I am wearing it curly today too, but I don't think it will make it to tomorrow. But I may have to invest in some spongy curlers.

From left to right: Talina (Scientist, for Halloween and in real life), Annie (gypsy, and the party was at her house), Sami Jo (Witch, for Halloween and not in real life), David (Cowboy, for Halloween and possibly in real life), and Christi sitting on the couch (she was an 80's Diva, or bridesmaid. The jury is still out on that one. Oh, that she is definitely NOT that in real life. Very stylish).

From left to right: Steve (Annie's husband, Nik's man-crush and a Mullet Biker, or something like that. Awesome hair though. Oh, and I'm not sure if he is that in real life...Annie?), David, Christi and Talina. By the way, Christi rocked hard on the drums. I have never seen anyone take to the percussion like she did. She should find a way to get paid to do that.

From left to right: Nik (sailor, we looked pretty hot together if you ask me, but he just looks like Gene Kelley right there. Which is still good. And he looks like that in real life a lot too.), Sami, Christi, Talina, Steve, David.

I caught a picture of Christi taking a picture of herself, Michelle's friend (I'm sorry, I don't remember her name, but she kicked our butts at Boxers or Briefs, and she didn't even know any of us!) and Michelle. Michelle is a lady Pirate, and a pretty sexy one at that.

Ok, so that was the party at Annie and Steve's. I think a good time was had by all. Thanks for throwing such a kickin' party!


Last weekend Nik and I went up the canyon so I could look and the leaves. It is my favorite part of the season, (especially since I know what is to come in the months ahead). And as Dooce said, it has lasted longer this year than I can remember it lasting in a very long time. I took the opportunity to take some photos and practice my depth of field. I think it is cheating to have the digital screen show me if I am on the right setting or not before I take the picture, but hey, I have a hard time remembering otherwise. Here are some pictures of that day.


And last but not least, here, finally is the pumpkin I carved right at the beginning of the month. He graced our ledge for about 3 nights, then fell apart. Can you guess who he is?