HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES

I wondered why the baseball was
getting bigger. Then it hit me.

Police were called to a day care
where a three-year-old was
resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the guy whose
whole left side was cut off? He's
all right now.

The roundest knight at King Arthur's
round table was Sir Cumference.

The butcher backed up into the
meat grinder and got a little behind
in his work.

To write with a broken
pencil is pointless.

When fish are in schools they
sometimes take debate.

The short fortune teller who escaped
from prison was a small medium at large.

A thief who stole a calendar
got twelve months.

A thief fell and broke his leg in wet
cement. He became a hardened criminal.

Thieves who steal corn from a garden
could be charged with stalking.

We'll never run out of math teachers
because they always multiply.

When the smog lifts in
Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

The math professor went crazy with
the blackboard. He did a number on it.